Part of why I started the Nine Moons is because my focus needed more, well, focus. I saw definite improvement last month. I also discovered some habits that really needed changing, especially with my husband’s new work schedule.
I used to do my evening devotional before bed. My husband now retires earlier than I do so my usual devotional (around 10 or 11 pm) just doesn’t cut it anymore now that we moved the altar into the bedroom to make room for his workbench in the art room. It’s also difficult to really focus when he’s home. Before he goes to bed, he likes to relax and play games. Naturally, there is noise involved. I don’t blame him – it’s how he unwinds after a long day. I can’t expect him to change his behavior when, really, it’s my discipline that needed adjusting. Why was I putting it off until so late anyway? I’m always very tired then.
This week I changed my behavior and started doing devotionals right after work. This simple change has helped me feel more connected on non-retreat days. I feel more energized and able to focus and/or still my mind. I’m meditating more often again. It’s a very good thing!
I realize now that I was blaming my husband’s work schedule for my troubles. It was really my poor scheduling – something entirely in my own power to control.